The body… health, cleanliness, nutrition, exercise, fresh air, the use and exchange of your energy to maintain and build the vision of your life, sexuality and the exchange of life, the family and the social dynamics of living in community…getting back to basics, the simplicity of physical foundations.

All else beyond that is a question of education, lifestyle, preferences, expectations, ambitions, social upbringing, self-measurements, creativity, the expansion of our joy and roles. Once we know who we are and have an understanding of our emotional make-up, all the above that is beyond our physical foundations, represents an advanced concept of our purpose and fulfillment.

Merriam-Webster’s definition of integrity:

1 : firm adherence to a code of especially moral or artistic values : incorruptability

2 : an unimpaired condition : soundness

3 : the quality or state of being complete or undivided : Completeness

synonyms: honesty

Alignment of the self through our personal integrity of love and joy, even in the midst of transitions, enables us to be accountable for our own lives. In relationships, for there to be any relationship at all, integrity is paramount. And this is true for all relationships.

In relationships between a man and a woman, one’s integrity involves clear communication. Spoken expectations and understandings are important after the courtship, dating or complimentary phase of emotional connection (or if you want to be down and dirty depending on your emotion make-up and the kind of relationship you desire, sometimes directly communicating what you both want can be more efficient). Clear communication of expectations and understandings enable the relationship to be built on a solid structure and a solid structure creates a win-win relationship.

Because people grow in self-awareness about their identity and with that may come change and separations in relationships, this does not mean that the giving, particularly in terms of the unquantifiable aspects of what the woman has given or gives, should be dismissed, not honored nor respected, especially when children are involved. In the case where respect and compassion for the life created has diminished, the question of integrity appears. Ask yourself, when a break-up has occurred or is occurring, has there been or is there honor in character and integrity through action in valuing what was or what is? Often times, when expectations are not communicated clearly during the structuring phase of a relationship and particularly when a win-win relationship for some reason has not been or can not be established, integrity plays a key role. At this point seemingly “victims” and “villains” emerge.

The Muse looks into the darkness to find the spiritual light by making meaning and then transforms it into her strength and the dignity of her life. How is this begun? Firstly, the darkness must be found. Secondly, the darkness is replaced by light through the trans-formative powers of the mind, a conscious decision is made to own and live in your light and then, by aligning your emotions, you empower your life.

In the November Feature I had mentioned I would be introducing to you the emotional component of accepting who you are and recognizing your light. As a gift to you this holiday season, I would like to introduce you to Wendy Yellen who is an Eidetic Life Coach, specializing in Transformation Acceleration. She very much likes to work with, what she calls “Ripple Makers and Tsunami Makers, those who are really ready for their PASSION to make an Even Bigger Difference!”.

Eidetic Imagery is… “Imagery in extreme detail; a sort of projection of an image on a mental screen….Of, relating to, or marked by extraordinarily detailed and vivid recall of visual images”… your images, the images you have created and can recreate with a new found sense of self. Wendy Yellen states, “In over 25 years of searching, studying, and practicing as an international life coach and therapist, I has never found a life-changing tool that even comes close to the work done through emotional imagery”.

For me, my journey with the work of Wendy Yellen has made a difference in opening myself to emotional possibilities

Fears, what are they? We all have them. Where do they come from? Why do we have them? What is their purpose? How come some of us have them more than others? These are all questions that bring to our attention our own vulnerabilities. When we look at our fears and face the darkness and immerse ourselves in the darkness, we humble ourselves and honor the unknown. In doing so, no matter how emotionally frightening resting in the unknown is, we show to ourselves that it is our “beingness” , without the need for action, that supports us in our darkest hour. So crucial to our “beingness”, this center that we can call home, the beginning of our truth, is our self-esteem.

Self-esteem, the fundamental source of our being, gauges our sense of self-worth (not to be confused with confidence which has more to do with how we socially express our ability in meeting challenges). Our self-esteem is paramount in helping us address our fears. Not only does a fortified sense of self provide the strength to face life’s challenges by tapping into the source to do so, it also gives us the ability to maintain our integrity when faced with choice. Knowing who you are and having a sense of worth is fundamental to honoring your truth as the gift of your life. Self-esteem and self-love can be learned. No matter where you begin and however much darkness you are in, you can find the light. That light is your own sense of worth, self-esteem and structure of your life. It is your purpose on Earth and when infused with emotion brightens the world.

I was sitting in the doctor’s office the other day waiting for a mammogram and while I was there I began to reflect on the nature of our physical lives as women. A couple of thoughts crossed my mind, the first having to do with the innocence of our bodies. I remember my ex-husband saying to me after our recent divorce that had I not married him, I would have been a nun. I was not sure what that meant as we had an abundantly sexual relationship and I did not give it much thought until today. Now, I sense that we had a different understanding of physical life and its innocence. I then looked across from me and two women sat next to each, one with a very young infant. When we began talking, I found out the women were mother and daughter and the infant was only seven weeks old. I imagined the miracle of life that the infant represented. She was quite amazing with a variety of expressions. The mother told me she also had a two and a half year old at home and she was just beginning to say “No”. Wow, I thought, the miracle of life is phenomenal and not only is the miracle of life phenomenal, so too is the learning process of how we become to know who we are.

The woman’s body is the conduit to spirit and gives birth to spirit. The respect shown for a woman’s body and the spirit that it hers is to respect life. The choices she makes about her life is the foundation of all of life. The need for mammograms, choosing whether or not to have a child, how to express our sexuality, the care of our physical appearance, the kinds of relationships we create are all representative of our physical existence as women. As women, we are the nurturers of life and so the decision becomes for ourselves: “Who, what, where, when and why do we want to nurture”? Nurturing emotionally, spiritually, as well as physically is the energy that we give to foster the growth and support of others. This energy that we give can be appreciated or devalued, either by ourselves or others. A list of questions for you highlights…

Sometimes our spiritual growth is manifested immediately. Sometimes it takes longer for the beauty of our wisdom to mature, ripen and bear fruit. Our spiritual unfolding is like a flower opening up, each petal delicately expanding to breathe in new life and new opportunities which transform our self-understanding as well as the recognition of the nature of our purpose. Time reveals all if we are at peace with listening to the self, accepting and creating from the space of our own inner “homes”.

What is the beauty of your worth? How will it reveal itself to you? How do you discover it? As a way to begin playing and experimenting with your worth, set aside some time for yourself to complete a fun three-part exercise.

Once you have decided to set some time aside for yourself, complete PART I of the excercise and then in PART II you will be asked to complete the first section before reading and completing the second section. If you can, set aside some time now to complete the first section of PART II before moving on. You will need paper and pen, so if it is not yet by your side, I suggest you get it now.

Take the time you need and want to complete this exercise fully.

Complete both PART I AND PART II of these exercises before reading and completing PART III. If your curiosity can be patient and read PART III only after you have completed the first two parts, it would be worth your while. I wonder how many people will be able to do this??? Are you one of them? The directions are laid out simply below to follow:

PART I

The first part of this exercise is to define what time specifically you can give to yourself, what time you can give to you for nurturing yourself each week. Can you give yourself an hour this week just for you with no distractions or more? Can you make it your time? Can you make a commitment to your time? Can you give yourself time now to do this exercise? Or would another time be better? Please make this decision.

Once you have decided how much time you can give yourself, you will then need to decide what kind of space or environment you like to create in? Is it in your bedroom? Perhaps at your desk or the kitchen table? Might it be in a natural setting, like a park or a special place where you feel most comfortable? Or maybe you even have an artist’s studio? Make a decision about a space where you feel most creative.

How much time do you give to yourself for yourself each week? Does that feel right to you? Is that enough? Do you want or need more time or space? It may be a good idea just to simply take note of that answer to yourself. How does your space feel? Is it the right space for you? Have you want to experiment with other spaces? Take note about the importance of that space to you.

Having made both of those decisions, we can move on to the first section of Part II.

PART II

Now in your space and with your time that you have given yourself, reflect and answer this question: By using an analogy, if you were a home right now, what type of “home” are you? Where is it? What is it? Is it an actual home or is it figurative, like a bird’s nest? Describe this home in writing. What are the colors? The sounds? If there are rooms, what are they for? Is there a natural component to it? Are there animals? What is the season? Are there important people to you? Is there anything else that you might want to add? Make it as creative and detailed as possible! Please write this now or come back after the writing is completed to read further.

COMPLETE THIS WRITING PORTION BEFORE READING FURTHER.

The Innocence of Love

What connects us? What is that experience of “being seen” and valued? Is it an energy that comes from the heart, so profound an energy of care that the boundaries are dropped, the defenses down and we find ourselves in a paradise filled with wonder, joy, acceptance and unlimited potential while all the while knowing we are safe and happy in the expression of our love?

We have just begun to hear personal stories from veterans who have been deployed to Iraq and Afghanistan over the last several years, but we haven’t really heard much about the impact that these deployments have on the children of military troops. Moranda Hern and Kaylei Deakin are now putting their faces to their truth and hope to unite others in telling their own personal stories.

Hern and Deakin are two California teenagers who faced feelings of frustration and depression after their fathers, both National Guardsmen, were deployed to the Middle East. As their families faced the day-to-day challenges of life at home and the uncertainty of their fathers’ fates overseas, both girls suffered from a drop in self-esteem and felt completely isolated amongst their peers. As daughter of National Guardsmen, the girls did not live in communities with other military families and their peers did not know how to relate to the challenges that both Hern and Deakin were dealing with at home.

That changed when the girls met each other through

Women and men are together in this world. A world that has been defined as masculine as it is the masculine that controls matter and the physical world is made up of matter. Where does that leave women? Who are women? What do they represent? What is their value? As man is the master of the physical world, women are the mistress of what kind of world?

A man’s developmental stages entail learning to manifest their vision of life and become successful protectors and providers and even better yet when the heart is engaged. They clearly then need to discover their vision first in order to manifest it and establish their worth.

Is it that women should follow the same model of development? Or is there a different model of development for women? All of these questions found in this June Feature are the basis for the courses that will be offered in the coming months.

Born in the Midwest, I have had a very challenging life from childhood. As an adult, I have had various jobs: I have worked as a nurses aid, as a waitress, owned a Surf Shop and a Tanning Salon, but through out those experiences I did not find that inner calling. It was when my first child was born, it was in that moment that I knew what I was here for: I am a Mother above all things. I cannot describe the feelings that go through you when your child is born, overwhelming happiness and a feeling of being satisfied, complete.

Since my first child was born in 1998, I have stopped working outside of the home. Since then, I have found a passion in writing and have had two more children (even though the doctors said it would not happen). Now life is somewhat chaotic at times.